NCAA to Expand March Madness Basketball Tournament to 256 Teams

INDIANAPOLIS, Ind.—With expansion being a hot topic for several years now, the NCAA decided to make a move they believe is something that was “bound to happen in the future.”

“We’re pleased to announce a level of inclusion that will see dollars go straight to our bank accounts in Bahrain,” NCAA President Mark Emmert told The Beet at a truck stop in on the outside of town. “That’s a lot of teams and a lot of tickets, which all means a lot of money for us.”

Emmert was joined by NCAA Tournament Selection Committee Chairman Kevin White at the truck stop, who ordered a pitcher of Zima and explained his excitement.

“Teams that have never been a part of the tournament before are going to experience something like they’ve never dreamed of,” White said. “If everything goes well, these deep-pocketed travel-addicted alumni will be going to a new regional site every week, hitting all the hotels we own and dining out at places where we’re getting a cut. Hello Vegas.”

It’s unsure just when the tournament will end now, but both Emmert and White didn’t seem worried.

“Hopefully we’ll be at the pool at the MGM Grand,” Emmert reiterated with a smile.

We asked what would happen if the media was requesting interviews at the time of tournament selection like they usually do.

“See, and that always kills us,” White said. “We’re going to get all that prerecorded this year. We’ll just record a bunch of scenarios and have someone edit it together and present it to ESPN as a ‘phone interview’. All the typical soundbytes, mostly talking about how a team got left out and everyone wants to cry about it.”

The changes go into effect immediately for the 2020 tournament. Stay with The Beet for the second or third most up-to-date information.

Obnoxious Mizzou Fan doesn’t believe in aliens, but has been as high as the guy on Ancient Aliens. Follow him on Twitter.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s